Estrangement is a painful disconnection between one or more family members, resulting in physical and emotional separation which can become chronic and even permanent. This separation can occur abruptly over a specific incident or become evident over time.
Estrangement can occur as a result of a single incident or chronic repetition of abuse, neglect, or simply unresolved miscommunications between family members. You may be a child estranged from your sibling and/or one or both parents. You may be a parent estranged from one or more of your children. However, estrangement is created and maintained, it can be invaluable to have support in deciding what course to take towards relieving the pain of separation from those whom you had assumed would never abandon you.
The Full Spectrum Approach does not assume that reconnecting with family members or reconciling is the only possible positive outcome of estrangement therapy. Reconciliation requires all parties to be willing to do the difficult work of accepting responsibility for their part in creating the estrangement. Parents and children must both be willing to acknowledge and apologize for their mistakes, and be willing to change their unrealistic expectations and behavior towards each other.
Unfortunately, when all parties are not willing to work towards reconciliation, is the therapeutic work focuses on accepting that you will need to find happiness in life without the support of some or even all your family members. No one, neither parent or child, is obligated to sacrifice their happiness by remaining in a neurotic family relationship. Every individual has as much right to happiness as any other. It is possible for both parents and children to live happily without each other. However, it is essential to have support in deciding whether or not reconciliation or continued separation is the best solution to relieving the pain of estrangement.
Both individual and family work can provide support in navigating a healthy course through the difficult waters of estrangement.
My office is in Manhattan, NY. However, I am available for phone consultation House Calls for crisis and in-home therapy, and carefully planned interventions anywhere and anytime on this planet, schedule permitting. Contact me for information and availability at alexander@dralexanderbingham.com